These last couple of months, whilst being fun have been incredibly busy. Not only have I been in an opera for a week’s run but I’ve had a small gig with my a capella group. And it’s not over yet. I have another two gigs coming up (these two our main concerts of the year) and I’m directing an opera too! Oh and all this whilst keeping the house in order (which has gone to the dogs a bit lately) and remembering to pick up the kids from school (so far so good) oh yes, and growing a baby!
I’m having one of those moments that I’m sure a lot of self-employed have of working out the balance between all the threads. My lovely Frank keeps reminding me that it’s likely most self-employed people don’t have so many different aspects in their life. Most of the people I know do have these aspects. Perhaps I’m hanging out with the wrong crowd? Anyway trying to weave the blanket of my life is a pattern which needs simplifying. But how?
I took a degree in Drama and Music so the opera, theatre and singing are a must-have in my life. They are my release and a joy to be involved in. But often lately I’ve found myself trying to learn my music (which is more challenging than in previous years) and longing to get hold of my crochet hook and finish those 3 projects which I’m halfway through. Often when backstage I find myself having some time to kill but not this year. So many changes of costume for our opera meant I took my crochet home after the first night having not even managed a cup of tea.
Now I’m not complaining or at least not meaning to. I think what I’m trying to do is apologise to my crochet for having left it behind, untouched, half finished and not really thought of for a couple of weeks. My main frustration is my Etsy shop. It’s currently empty but not for want of trying. My aim is to now finish the gigs and other opera to the best of my ability and then go crochet crazy. I feel excited about this. It means I can look back on this year and say: ” I was in a play, an opera, I directed an opera which I did superbly and was fabulous in my singing gigs. I’ve crocheted 3 commissioned items, made at least 9 birthday presents and got all my Christmas presents done on time and sold loads on my online shop whilst balancing a calm and serene home life and bringing a newborn into the mix.” Ok so this is my most optimistic hope but we can all dream.
I love directing and I love singing but both take a lot of brain space and energy. Lots of lovely people keep telling me to rest. Whilst I’m thrilled I’ve surrounded myself with such wonderful people I keep asking myself “how?” I’m often asked how I balance it all. Well the truth is sometimes the blanket of my life unravels and I get caught up in the threads. When that happens I deal with the simplest knot first and then the others. My blanket is made of many parts and the key is to concentrate on one section at a time. If I do this my blanket will be beautiful and well crafted, it may take a while but it’ll be worth it.
My family helps. My husband has been helping keep the house in order and his wife sane (not an easy job). The kids have been generally really good of late. Ok they have their bad moments as of course kids do but more often they have lovely moments. I have had the pleasure of watching them lost in their imaginations, loving the spring bursting forth all around and their joy in flowers. Finn in particular picks me a flower everyday at the moment simply because he can. Whether it be a daisy or a dome of blossom it’s a lovely thought (although I have a lot of dead daisies on my handbag).
So weaving I shall continue to do. I have a wonderful team behind me on the opera and it feels good and helps me concentrate on my time with the cast which is vital. I am loving rehearsals and proud of what we’ve achieved so far. In my singing group the others are lovely and very patient. I’ve been helped a lot to learn my music and after some catching up I feel like I now just have to polish my performance. Basically whilst I’m missing my crochet my other achievements are huge and that I need to remember. All those projects will be finished eventually and I will sell my goods this year. I have all summer to do this before my baby is born. That’s doable…..right?